Meet the Queen of Clean
Allow me to introduce you to America’s queen. What? You didn’t know the United States had royalty? When it comes to cleaning we do. Meet Linda Cobb, the “Queen of Clean” (trademarked of course).
Any woman dubbing herself the Queen of Clean is immediately suspect. Imagine for a moment that such a ruler happens to be the president of the neighborhood association, your boss, or, better yet, your mother-in-law. It would be hard to relax around such a person because the implication is that no matter how clean you are (or think you are), she is cleaner. Therefore, you are somehow “dirty” and no one wants to be known that way.
At first glance, I thought the Queen of Clean would be almost impossible to like—an imperious white-gloved know-it-all checking for her reflection in your bathroom tiles and tsk-tsk-ing at every sign of dirt—but I was surprised to find her quite lovable.
“Personally there are only two things that I do every day: kiss the King and feed the cat. I make the bed most days (it’s so much nicer to come home to) and I do try to see that the dishes are done, but sometimes I’m just so busy or distracted that even the simplest tasks fall by the wayside.”
“I don’t believe in keeping to someone else’s schedule and someone else’s rules. I believe in making my schedule work for me, and I have only one rule: IF IT’S NOT DIRTY, DON’T CLEAN IT.”
–Linda Cobb, How the Queen Cleans Everything
Do you like her already?
Her book, How the Queen Cleans Everything is a quick-read reference book on how to clean just about everything in your home as well as a month-by-month schedule that includes cleaning tasks as well as fun things like a recipe for Super Bowl guacamole and home spa treatments for Mother’s Day.
Below are just a very few of the useful tips in her book:
1. Scenting your house for guests.
“[I]f you sprinkle some cinnamon in some boiling water and let it simmer, then the house will have a beautiful, homey aroma. . . It’s a warm fuzzy. And it’s very easy.”
2. Keep ice cream fresh.
“That frosty film inside the carton of ice cream is not a protective coating, and it can be prevented. Just cover the top of the ice cream with wax paper and press firmly. No more “protective crystals!”
3. Clean up after the beach or sandbox.
“Sprinkle baby powder on sandy beach bodies and the sand will fall right off.”
4. Garden Pest Prevention
“Bothered by moles and gophers? Some people swear by castor bean plants, but the leaves and seedpods are poisonous to children and pets. . . Try human hair instead. . . . Ask your hairdresser for a bag of clippings and stuff the hair into the hole. . . . Discourage fleas and flies from gathering around your pet’s outside eating and sleeping area by planting rue (Ruta graveolens) nearby. You can also rub rue on furniture to keep cats . . . from scratching. Just use care that you don’t discolor upholstery.”
5. Mark laundry stains.
“Use a brightly colored clothespin to mark the stain, or use a rubber band and wrap it tightly around the area that needs to be spotted prior to laundering. Have family members do this before they put their clothes into the hamper.”
6. Recycle Used Dryer Sheets
“Retired dryer-fabric softener sheets have plenty of uses left, so don’t waste them . . . I put my used dryer sheets in an empty tissue box I keep in my laundry room.”
What does she use them for?
“If you have a casserole or pan with burned-on food, fill with hot water, toss in a softener sheet for several hours (overnight is fine) and the burned-on food will slide right out.”
“Tuck a used sheet into shoes before placing them in your luggage. Shoes will smell fresh and you can use the dryer softener sheet to buff shoes and remove dust after wearing.”
“Use it to wrap Christmas ornaments or other fragile things before boxing for storage. The dryer sheet will protect them and you can wipe Christmas ornaments prior to hanging on the tree to reduce static electricity and repel dust.”
7. Recycle Dryer Lint
“For an inexpensive and safe fire starter, use the lint you gather from your dryer lint filter. The soft balls of lint ignite quickly to get the kindling blazing.”
8. Shoelace Fix
“If Plastic Tips Fall Off Your Shoelaces . . . Easy—twist the ends of the shoelaces and dip in clear nail polish.”
9. Washing pantyhose
“To wash panty hose with ease in the washer: Use an old panty hose leg to hold a pair of good panty hose. Just knot the end of the panty hose leg at the top so the panty hose won’t come out during washing.”
10. Toy Cleaner
“Stuffed fabric toys that can’t be washed can still be cleaned. Just place in a platic bag with some baking soda and salt and shake vigorously a few times a day for several days. This should remove dust, dirt and odor.”
If you are enjoying the Queen’s tips, you might like to visit her website, queenofclean.com, blog, Facebook page or Twitter site, where she posts tips and videos from her appearances on local news television. As you can see from the clip below about cleaning to prevent cold and flu germs, the Queen is rather charming and sweet…and yes, she does know more about cleaning than the rest of us!